First and Last Birthday Party for Grayson

May 9th& 10th 2021

Binnie, 
Gray was understanding that you didn't get to chat with him. Our day got away from us as well!

After Dad got home from his meetings last week Grayson asked if could open his gifts. He said, "Should I start with the tie?" 

"Sure, start with the tie," I said. For that reason, he was surprised to open socks! 

His gifts were pretty random, he got the silly spoof church movies that he can never seem to get his hands on but always wants to watch, brownie mix, and blog books!

I had so much to say in 2020 it spilled into TWO editions. Volume 1 and 2. It isn't unusual to find Gray reading away in the living room, softly chuckling now and again. 

Gray and I drove to Huber Grove for Senior pics and then stopped by his friend's house in Midway to visit. That is where we were when you called. The day was going by so fast! Everyone was waiting for us at home so we could eat the banana cream pie and watch a movie. 

FULL DAY.

Grayson's friends are the sweetest, most thoughtful bunch around. They threw him a surprise party on Monday night! When Dani called to ask if they could hold it at our house, I figured the best way to keep it a surprise would be to not tell a soul. When Abby K. stopped by out of blue to pick him up for a scavenger hunt, I reacted so genuinely that she was convinced I didn't even know about the party. Oh, but I DID know. I had lasagna and fired up mac n' cheese in the oven. The partiers came over to begin decorating while I started on six baguettes. 

The scavenger hunt took over an hour. They took him all around Heber and Midway. When he arrived back at home, Dad said that he was going to come in the back door, but then he switched course to the front. The friends moved in a huddle accordingly. Then, "SURPRISE!" 

What a difference a year makes. He wasn't friends with any of these people, except Corbin, a year ago. 

And what a difference EIGHTEEN years make. Grayson has never wanted a birthday party. As a kid, he would say, "Dad works hard, I don't want people eating our food!" He was born an adult man in a kid body. For that reason, the idea of crazy neighbor kids running through the house was a real turn-off to him. So, I was happy to host a birthday party for Grayson. FINALLY.

Instead of the party being a "roast," his friends took turns saying nice things about him. Dani said, "Grayson is the best conversationalist. He can talk to anybody! I know God put him in my path." 

Brady said, "I have never met someone who will just give you a compliment out of the blue while you are talking to them."

Corbin had gone to the trouble to drive to the BYU store to buy a BYU jersey that he knew Grayson liked. He liked! 

My heart bursts with gratitude for these good friends in his life. 

I bought a vanilla buttercream cake AND a chocolate tuxedo cake from Costco. We were feasting on those the rest of the week! We also kept up all the decorations since May is like December around here, we party all month long.

Dani and Corbin came over the next day to see if she left her phone. I hadn't seen it. She said the night before they took the cushions off the couch to look. I had to laugh. Here I got the house all clean for the party, and they ended up digging up old easter candy, darts, and scripture markers out of the couch. I looked with them one more time. I found it wedged way in there. 

Dani said, "Isn't that just like it. The MOM FINDS IT." 

Love, the mom.

The WERTH of a Soul

    Earlier this year, our ward had three baptisms in one day. I wanted to bring something to the newly baptized members to show our support. I had a bowl of Werther’s caramels so I made them each a candy lei. Then I looked for a scripture passage to attach, "Remember the worth of souls is great in the sight of God;" (D&C 18:10). Get it, WERTH? 

           Last Sunday, a newly baptized 8-year-old boy was sitting on the stand. I thought to myself, “I wish I still had some Werther’s caramels to make him a candy lei so I could bring it over today.”

           Then when it was time for Relief Society, Katrina Radmall, found me and sat by me. During the lesson, I noticed that tucked into the spiral of her journal, was a Werther’s candy! I asked her if she had any more. She said that her sister had given her the candy and she might have more. After the lesson when her sister walked into the chapel, Katrina asked her if she had any more caramels. Andrea was hesitant, “whyyyyy?” So, I explained what I needed them for. Andrea was very happy to help. I went to their house after church and got the caramels to make a baptism lei for the newly baptized member—he pointed to himself excitedly through the glass, “For me?” 

           Grayson was in the car with me so I shared the story of how the lei came to be. I said, “That is a tender mercy from Heavenly Father.”

           He nodded, “Maybe. Or it’s just a coincidence.”

           I said, “No way. There is no way that I would need Werther’s candy—for a “worthy” cause—and have one show up within the hour. Katrina could have already eaten the candy or it could have been in her bag, where I wouldn’t have seen it. Nah, it was meant for me! “

         I read in Come Follow Me this week, “He that receiveth of God, let him account it of God;” (D&C 50:34). I do account this experience to be of God. I also know that by acknowledging His hand, we are able to recognize it more often in our lives.

Talkin' Bull and Thugs May 9, 2021

Binnie,

Grayson wasn't kidding. As soon as we went outside, someone yelled from a passing truck, "Chicago!" Course, Gray was wearing his new shirt. After I took this picture, he looked down at the ground, "Look, a cigarette butt." I asked, "What'd you point that out for? Now you
are grounded!"

If not for smoking, for littering. Earlier in the week, when I heard the truck door slam, I peeked out the window. Grayson was at the curb, putting a plastic bag in the garbage can. As soon as he let go, it blew away. He started after it, but the wind was too strong, so he gave up. I called out the window, "Catch it!" 

He shook his head, "Too fast." 

I hate a litterbug.

Then there was me. As I tried to throw away my volunteer badge in front of JR, it also blew away. I thought of pulling a Grayson, but then I remember my name was on it. Better run after it!

(Thanks to technology, Matt got to Zoom in to Callie's performance on MAY THE FOURTH).

During Callie's orchestra performance, I leaned over to Graham, "They let someone out of jail to come and play tonight." I watched his eyes as he scanned the students and then broke out into a giggle when he realized who I was talking about. I shouldn't have.

Aside from Callie and Graham running in after her orchestra concert, we have been much better at staying away from Crumble since you left (wink). However, they came to me! Mal sent this fun box for Mother's Day. You are right, go for the one that looks like a five-year-old would love, it's the best one! Callie and I both agreed on the cookie that looks like it was made from pink play-dough. I had a relief Society dinner that night. I passed on the cheesecake because I knew I had that box waiting for me at home. 

Thursday again turned into my busy pants day. Water Aerobics, school, dinner to a friend, National Day of Prayer, Track car-pooling, Volunteering at JR (I volunteer at the same as Abby E; two Abbys!), Relief Society Social...all in one day! Yay for Callie for pitching in making pancakes for her and Graham for dinner.

It's been a minute since I've seen my siblings! We met on Saturday in Orem to dine with the parents for Mother's Day. "Where are we going to dinner? Okay, let me put on my Mi Ranchito outfit..."

Eliza left to help Kate get ready for Prom, Dad left to take the boys to a Jazz game. At that point, I switched seats to the other end of the table. I hadn't chatted with the Shafers since January!

We visited Grandma Donna before meeting up with the family for dinner. She has had a heck of a time getting over this stomach bug. She has also had a heck of a time trying to locate her library card. She took it out of her wallet to go to Hawaii, and she can't remember where she put it. Just wait, you'll see...

Dad had lots of tales to tell her. His week was quite eventful in New Mexico. He was there Monday through Friday. On Tuesday morning, he texted me a picture of his driver's side window bashed in with the caption, "They took everything!" Oh my. I called him, and as it turns out, it was just everything from in the console. I asked what was in there; he couldn't quite remember. They did take his work and church keys—which can be replaced—and his company gas card, which was also replaced. I thought hard, "Didn't you have hand sanitizer and Tylenol in there as well?" He remembered that both were empty! Boy, the thugs literally got away with nothing except maybe a couple bucks in change. I told the kids about the morning Dad had. You know us, we got into a bit of a re-enactment, 

"They took EVERYTHING!" 

"Like what?" 

"I don't know." 

Car theft is such a problem in New Mexico that they have a special hotline. Still, it took the Po-Po four hours to call back.  What a hassle it all was to get the window replaced. Then his debit card was hacked ironically at the same time. So, lots of time on the phone for Dad. Thugs! Remember that song we used to listen to?

"Hey Homies (what's up?)

What was that? (clap clap)

We don't need no thugs

Unless those thugs was givin' out hugs

For reals, don't we need more of that! It got me thinking; we really do become what we feed our souls. 

I had a couple of conversations this week with people who, pre-pandemic had zero opinion on any of it. However, due to a steady diet of filling their souls with what is written and reported, they are literally not the same people. Yet, both are on completely opposite ends of the spectrum. I too, used the phrase—in a text thread to The Quad this week—"I am literally not the same person" (in regards to going back to school). WE BECOME WHAT WE FEED OUR SOULS.

This was my most intense week of school yet. If I work away all week, I am always done by Saturday. However, this week required Saturday as well. I had my first exam! My instructor said that most people take up to two hours to complete it, yet still end up only scoring 35 out of 50. I was nervous! I spent a good amount of time going over the Exam Guide, said a prayer, and began. Twenty-five minutes later, I was done and scored 47 out of 50. I felt so relieved! The topic is the IPA (International Phonetic Alphabet). I texted Katrina, "I totally didn't even know IPA was a thing." 

She wrote back, "Isn't it so fun?" 

"So fun."

 As it turns out, there is a periodic table—if you will—for sounds! You can see how to pronounce any language in the world if you become familiar with it. BUT. It is intense. I love it.

Enough about that. Today is Grayson's BIG 18! I was literally fighting back tears as I wrapped the gifts and cut out an 18 from red construction paper. RED? Yes, a color he would have scoffed at months ago is now his jam all because of the Chicago Bulls. The wrapping paper I used is red plaid and deer with antlers (we are going to pretend they are bulls). I had grand plans for a fun cake, but my week was chock-full, and then THAT EXAM. I will make a banana cream pie and we will enjoy our Sabbath. Dad even gets to be with us all day. True, it is also Mother's Day, but I want it to be about him. He said that he wants it to be about me, so it seems we will be having a match with our writs flapping at each other, "NO, it's about YOU!" 

He's not having one, but birthday parties are back! Callie hasn't been to one in a year, but she had two this weekend. She also went to WDC's production of Frozen and hung with friends. A social butterfly. Graham hung with friends on Friday after school. They had Chess Club, then came here to gather bikes to ride to the bowling alley for eats. The problem with his group is that they all have to scat pretty early. Grayson went to the Cernyars (the twins) surprise party on Saturday night at 5. Earlier in the day, he said, "They just texted and asked if I can hang out tonight. What should I say?"

I suggested, "I am waiting to hear back whether or not I need to work." 

He said, "That's good. You came up with that quick." 

"I've used em' all, honey."

Well, HONEY. Just like the Bees, you work so hard! LOVE YOU. 

Mom

Snapshots of the day:

When we came home from church Corbin was parked out front. I rolled down my window and said, "I don't think Grayson is back yet." 

He called back, "I'm not here to see Grayson, I'm here to see you." He walked over and handed me a bag of Lindor truffles. My favorite! The unexpected gesture was simply the sweetest. 

Then later his friend Abby asked him to come over. He came back with sunflowers for me! I promptly arranged them on the back deck. To say they bring a smile to my face is an understatement.

The surf and turf Matt grilled up had Poe sniffing the air like crazy.

"Yo Chicago!" May 2, 2021

Binnie!

Another week has gone by! I hope your second vaccine went okay; I prayed for you. What a treat that we got to see you briefly on Tuesday for THE CALL! That has been our fun news of the week. I was texting with Jaynee yesterday, and she was as shocked as everyone. All the focus has been on YOU, so Grayson getting his call wasn't even on anyone's radar— which has been a fun aspect. 

As you can imagine, we were a bundle of nerves on Tuesday, waiting for it to all go down in the evening. Callie made a pan of peanut butter bars for the occasion. We were all ready for the guests with a half-hour to spare—Gray was jittery. I offered a prayer, and we gathered our wits. So exciting!

Originally, Grayson had decided to open his call with just the five of us and then make an announcement later. However, everyone knew he was waiting for his call. He heard lots of, "I want to be there!" and "Make sure you tell me when it comes!" He changed his mind and decided on a traditional call opening. 

We discussed how sometimes you just have to deal with the anxiety and push forward. It doesn't mean you run from the situation. This was a good lesson for that. For me, life seems to be full of one anxiety-producing situation after another. The more you push through, the easier life becomes!

(Technology is our friend! Ava on Zoom from Virginia, Katrina on Zoom from Texas, Mallerie on Zoom in Hawaii. Grayson talked to Grandma Donna immediately after opening his call.)

He is thrilled with his call. We pulled out the vacation book of when Dad and I went to Chicago for our Sixteenth Wedding Anniversary. Little did we know...

Grayson said that at school, random people call out to him, "CHICAGO!" He likes how it sounds, though he doesn't know how they know. I said, "All of your friends were filming and posting to social media—that is how." It was fun to have Granny and Grandpa and Eliza and Kate pop in. I know he felt their support. And then the Erickson family showed up. So, it was a party.

One of his friends (who goes by the name of Diamon Shifter, who came to the opening, also had his call show up that day. However, he is going to wait till Sunday to open it. He invited me to attend the call opening. Maybe I can send Tony in my place;) The call will read, "Dear Diamond Shifter..."

Callie's teeth: On Monday, she had to get THREE pulled for her ortho treatment. She has three baby teeth that are not budging. Since Dr. Nord can't straighten teeth that are still in the gums, we needed to speed things along.  She was a good sport; the numbing was the worst part. 

 

The next morning, she put on a short play in her Drama class. First, she invited me, then she uninvited me, then she invited me again. She couldn't decide if having me there would make her more nervous or feel supported. I told her I was fine either way! The play was titled "Homecoming Interviews." She was in it with Haylie and another girl. She appropriately wore an old HoCo dress that we have on hand. Since the class was 1st period, Haylie came over that morning for C to do her hair. I also had to set my alarm to get myself together. Callie was still unsure, "I don't know if you should come. I don't know if any other parents will be there." I said, "Too late now; I'm up and ready!" It turned out that there were other parents besides Dad and me. She did a great job! She had a lot of lines. Both of us were pleasantly surprised—and glad we were there. She was too. 

Blessed be, it has finally warmed up! Oh, my goodness, it is GLORIOUS. Callie and I stood in the backyard yesterday in the warmth. It filled our souls. The blossoms are at full throttle in Utah County. The drive down the canyon near brought a tear to my eye. GLORIOUS. Going in and out of Sam's Club, I relished that I was not freezing. Oh, I hope it is here to stay!

We enjoyed a bike ride on Thursday evening and again on Saturday. We worked in the yard, much to Graham's chagrin. He said the sun's rays were extra potent that day. He kept his sweatshirt and long pants on. He even grabbed a hat for the bike ride. We ate at Mo's, Heber's little secret—and our new favorite! For a treat, we tried freeze-dried Skittles called Frittles. It's a thing!

We also cleaned the church on Saturday. Grayson never did come out to help in the yard so I was surprised when he said, "I'm going to the church to get a head start on the cleaning." 

By the time we left, I wondered if there would be anything for us to do! Graham pointed out though, "He's just playing basketball." Ah, got it! 

I thought Cody's reminder email was awfully thoughtful.

*Just wanted to also let you know that I appreciate you guys a ton! Bishop, we pray for you and your Counselors each day and appreciate the service you give. Abby, your discussions during Sunday School are amazing and always bring the Spirit. Grayson and Graham, Thank You for always being ready to Pass and Bless and Prepare the Sacrament, it makes more of a difference than you may know. Callie, I have enjoyed your Testimony when you have spoken and appreciate your happy attitude at all times. It was also good to hear Ava speak of going through the Temple and her preparations for her mission. Keep up the great work, all of you!

Last week my schooling consisted of a lot of get-to-know-you and course instruction. This week was the real deal.

My thought process for the week: 

M: "I've got all week to get my assignments done—no need to rush."

T: "Whoa, there is a ton to do! I probably should've done more yesterday."

W: "Seriously? Is this even possible to get all of this done? What was I thinking taking on 12 credits!?!"

TH: "That was so fun volunteering at JR Smith. Yeah, I got this. I totally know what I am doing." (Later that evening) "What?! I thought I didn't have very many more assignments, but look how much I still have left!"

F: "Finish line in sight, just keep plugging along (my back is so stiff!)."

I do not even dare how many hours I spent!!! BUT I do love all my classes.  And yes, I am volunteering with the ESL students at JR once a week! While talking with Katrina a couple of weeks ago, she asked if I was doing my in-classroom observation yet. I said, "I don't think I have to do that." 

Then the first assignment came, "Find a classroom..." I am glad I have connections around town. When Principal Brown saw me at the school, he was confused. He thought he had been conversing through email with YOU this whole time!

I get asked about you a lot, "How is Ava?" Kaylee found me at church to ask. I saw Trevi, she asked as well. So, I will join with them, "HOW IS AVA???" 

Life Without Sweets is Not Sweet—April 26, 2021

Hello Sweet Binnie,

Love your updates—like that you will be able to get out and about a little more now. Here is life in Heebs.

Last Sunday, Brinley sang "His Hands;" she did a beautiful job. Graham had never heard the song before. During the song, he kept sniffling—due to allergies. I said, "People probably thought you were really feeling it!"

He realized, "Plus, my eyes were all puffy." Tender guy;)

We've fallen into a Sunday routine around here. After church, Dad's appointments go till about 3:30 or 4:00 when we have dinner. Grayson goes to Mission Prep at 4:30 for about an hour while we clean up. In the evening, we gather in the basement to watch a couple of episodes of The Chosen while eating Dad's freshly popped corn. Last night we added brownie Sundaes with white chocolate whipped cream and nuts. Grayson observed, "I love our Sundays" (I think he loved the sundaes just as well).

Graham caught a line in The Chosen where someone referred to their train of thought. Graham pointed out, "Trains hadn't been invented yet." He's a thinker.

We got in one of our giggle-fits last night after watching. I was still laughing as I brushed my teeth. I peeked in Gray's room; he was still laughing too. You can picture Dad just shaking his head, "You guys...."

Last Sunday, Dad put together a special Sacrament Meeting all about Temples. That evening at dinner, he said he wouldn't be surprised if we found out the next day that temples were opening. Sure enough, the next day, Provo temple moved to phase 2.5, which means the kids can now do baptisms by appointment! (However, getting an appointment is another story).  

Dad's back was bothering him, so I predicted that his back was going to go out. He took a road trip to Idaho on Monday. My prediction also came true—he came home looking sideways. For that reason, I insisted I come along to pick up Grandma Donna from the airport on Friday morning. Between the two of them, it was a sight to behold. It was great to see her, but the red-eye left her exhausted. Despite the mask mandate, she got off the plane so sick.

The spring semester for BYU-I began on Monday. So far, so good! Though if I have to introduce myself one more time, I might scream. After aerobics on Thursday morning, I drove up to Mirror Lake gas station for donuts. I listened to "All In" as I drove through beautiful scenery on a lovely morning. I was listening to a story of a girl who fled Iran for religious freedom. It made me feel so incredibly blessed. You are so lucky that you will not be thrown in jail or tortured for speaking about the Bible!

I put the donuts on the cake stand when I got home. I was curious how long it would take people to notice them. It's about 2.5 seconds. Dad was confused, "I can't figure you out, you are a health nut, and yet you bought donuts." I'll tell ya what, life without sweets is what would make me a nut.

Grayson finally had a home track meet. Timing it right is tricky. We missed his first run and then sat for hours waiting for the second. I do love to watch him, though. It was after 7 pm by the time we left, so the babes were hungry. I was in the mood for a File-O-Fish. Graham was giddy, "Our annual trip to McDonald's." I wondered if we even go that often. (Then Dad got me an egg McMuffin after picking up Grandma. Twice in one week? Who AM I?)

 

Note: Yes, I still say babes and babies when I am referring to G and C. One evening, as I called them for dinner, I didn't realize that Callie was in her room recording something for a class. She said that in the background of the recording, you could hear me calling, "Teeny-tiny babies, it's time for dinner!"

Grayson had his annual dermatologist appointment (a six-month waiting list!) As you know, his skin has been a real irritant to him his senior year. As we predicted, there isn't a lot to be done for him. Grayson was making me laugh so hard on the way home from the dermatologist as he imitated what had just gone on, "Here are some more creams that probably won't work, but they might! You can keep taking those pills, or stop, either way! Blah blah blah..."

Callie wanted to dye her hair. She helped me pick out some dye earlier in the week but finding a time to do it was a different problem altogether. On Thursday's I get up early for my 5:45 am water aerobics. It had been a full day, so by evening, we all just wanted to watch a movie. I was half asleep when it ended. Callie asked, "Can we dye my hair now?" Uh, that'd be a "no." We found the time on Saturday morning. She looks like a cutie-patootie. She sure is busy these days with Gloria and Haylie. I came home one day to see a Laffy-Taffy stand on the corner. I took them to Zion's Bank to get their money divided afterward. I told them they could compensate me with a Laffy.

You can sort of see a plaid jacket under the street sign. It fell out of someone's truck. We kept it there, hoping the owner would see it. However, after the kids informed me that Gloria's dog had peed on it, I had Graham put it in the trash—using a ten-foot pole.

The weather is struggling so hard to warm up! On Friday night, since it was somewhat warm, I suggested we support the local food trucks. There were some parked at the Wright-Tree Stadium for a lacrosse fundraiser. However, as we waited in a long line—that wasn't budging an inch—a guy came out of the truck and mumbled something about, "I need to go get more supplies. Thank you for your patience." We kept seeing him, first seemingly looking for his keys, then his wallet.

I noted, "He hasn't even left yet." Nah. We didn't have that much patience. Nor did we have all night. We picked up Panda and ate it on the patio at home before finishing a Jurassic marathon in the basement—our favorite thing to do! Callie and I also started on Anne of Green Gables. I'll make a fan out of one of you yet!

Love you so much, my teeny-tiny baby,

Mom!